First Date Anxiety? Here Are Our Top Tips To Help Things Go Smoothly
Meeting someone you’ve been chatting with online for the first time can no doubt be anxiety inducing, you’re not sure what to expect, whether you’ll both get on and then there’s the nervousness that comes with saying or doing the wrong thing.
No matter if you’re recently single, new to the dating game or a seasoned pro, everyone can feel anxious before going on a first date.
To help things go smoothly the next time you’re wining and dining, why not check out our first date tips?
First dates always start off a bit awkwardly, but with our top tips you’ll feel calm and confident!
1. Keep It Simple
Do you want to make your next date your best yet? A tip we have for you is to keep things simple.
What we mean by this is, don’t over plan where you’re going or what you’re going to do, instead plan a casual date and head to a bar or cafe for a drink.
If you and the other person hit it off, you’ll have plenty of time in the future to plan extravagant dates like going out for dinner or having a day out, you don’t want to overcomplicate things.
By keeping things simple, there’s a lot less pressure, and you can actually get to know the other person by simply just sitting down and chatting.
This also means that if things don’t go to plan and you’re not really vibing with the other person, it’s pretty easy to head home from a drink in a bar than leave a candle-lit dinner before the second course has even arrived!
2. Be Authentic
You may think our next first date tip is a cliché, but it’s so important to be authentic when meeting new people.
Being authentic is all about being true to who you are, we all want to come across as a great person and leave a good impression, but if you’re putting on a front, the truth will come out sooner or later.
For example, don’t say you love getting up early in the morning and going on hikes if in truth, that sounds like your worst nightmare, telling white lies to impress someone is not being authentic.
You want the right person to eventually love you for you, so start as you mean to go on and stay true to YOU!
3. Think About What You Want
When dating new people, you should think about what it is you’re after, are you looking for a long-term relationship?
Perhaps you’re just looking to keep things casual and see what happens? Or maybe you’re not sure what exactly it is you want.
Like they say, honesty is always the best policy.
You don’t have to immediately tell someone on the first date you’re looking for a long term relationship, but being honest about your dating goals from the get-go is crucial.
No matter if you want something serious, or you’re wanting to see how things go, start by being honest with yourself about what it is you want.
Then after a few dates with someone, you should lay your dating goals on the table, so you don’t lead anyone on if you both want different things.
What it is you want could change and that’s okay, but if it does, make sure to communicate this with the person you’re seeing!
4. Meet Sooner, Rather Than Later
When it comes to first date tips, our next piece of advice is to meet up with someone sooner rather than later.
Whilst it’s important to get to know someone before meeting up with them in-person, you don’t want to chat to someone online for too long.
This is because meeting up in person can really show whether there really is an attraction there or not, you could hit it off great online but when you finally meet, you realise there’s not a spark.
Doing things on your own schedule and not feeling pressured to go on dates quicker than you’d like is all well and good, but at the same time, don’t drag things on for weeks chatting to someone online.
Save yourself the time and effort by going on a date and seeing how it goes!
5. Dress Comfortably
Wondering what to wear on a first date? As the saying goes, when we look our best, we feel our best.
So, when you’re going to meet up with someone from a dating app or social media, try to wear something you not only feel comfortable in but confident too.
It’s not about dressing to impress as such, you should dress for yourself and wear what you feel good in, then if the other person compliments you, that’s a bonus.
Sure, put effort into your appearance when dating but remember what we said about being authentic?
That relates to how we present ourselves too, so don’t wear something you wouldn’t usually just to show off to someone.
After all, dating is already nerve-wracking enough, you don’t want to sit worrying about your top falling down or your heels being too uncomfy to walk in!
6. Ask Questions & Pay Attention
If you’re going on a first date, make sure to ask questions to get to know the other person better and tell them about you, don’t just let the other person ask all of the questions.
It’s important to also pay attention to what the other person is saying, your nerves may be a bit all over the place at first but you don’t want to sit there checking your phone or not actively listening to what they’re saying.
If you need to check your phone or let someone know you’re okay, you can do this when the person you’re on a date with goes to the toilet or to the bar for example.
Likewise, talking about yourself is good, but it’s about having a balance, you want the other person to have a chance to talk about themselves too.
7. Enjoy Yourself
Dating new people and experiencing new things should be an enjoyable time, so try not to see a date like it’s a job interview or something you have to work yourself up about.
It’s okay to feel nervous about meeting someone for the first time, everyone does, but try and get those feelings out of the way and have fun.
By making sure to have a good time when you’re on dates and taking whatever comes from it, you’ll learn a lot about yourself and what it is you’re after.
If you find yourself not enjoying dates for whatever reason, it may be best to take a break from the dating scene for a little while.
8. Follow Things Up Correctly
The dating game is trial and error, sometimes you’ll hit it off with people, and other times you won’t.
If you go on a date with someone and you don’t see any sparks there or you notice some red flags, you should send them a message after letting them know you had a great time but you think it’s best not to see each other again.
It can feel awkward to tell someone you’re not romantically interested in them after a date, especially if you sense they are, but it’s much better than ghosting them.
Treat people how you’d want to be treated and be honest in your communication when following things up after a date.
You don’t have to go into loads of detail why you think you’re not compatible, just keep things short and sweet!
If you had a successful first date, follow things up by letting them know you really enjoyed spending time with them and would like to do it again some time.
That’s it from us when it comes to date advice, we hope our first date tips have proved useful.
We wish you all the best with your dating endeavours, remember to have fun above all!
How do you deal with dating anxiety? Do you have any first date tips for us? Let us know @essentialstudentliving.